


nothing ever stays the same

by mfdunklaus



Category: A Series of Unfortunate Events - Lemony Snicket
Genre: Angst, Comedy, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Minor Character Death, Nightmares, The first chapter is just fluff - Freeform, The first chapter is wholesome, a bit?, and they were ROOMMATES, i tried to write in some jokes, mention of Sunny & Violet & Isadora & Quigley, the second one gets fucking depressing, you don’t have to read the second one
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-01
Updated: 2021-02-28
Packaged: 2021-03-13 05:13:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,259
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29771184
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mfdunklaus/pseuds/mfdunklaus
Summary: He reached up to take out his earbuds, “What did you just say?” He asked, looking at the distressed Duncan, puzzled.“Uhm.. Err- i’m-“ Duncan stammered, he already lost his courage, “Why do you have a picture of me in your wallet...?”Klaus stares at him for a long second, “Did you touch my stuff again?”
Relationships: Klaus Baudelaire/Duncan Quagmire, Violet Baudelaire/Quigley Quagmire
Kudos: 10





	1. Real Love

**Author's Note:**

> DONT HIT ME I KNOW IM CHEESY HEHE  
> i’m avoiding writing forevermore if you haven’t noticed i’ve been feeling down and i need ~closure~

Well, technically it wasn’t Duncan’s fault. 

Okay i lied, it totally was. 

So here’s the thing: when the Quagmire is bored he has this tendency to start cleaning up, and cleaning up almost always includes roaming through things, trying to find something without knowing exactly what. 

And his roommate-slash-long-term-unrequited-love, Klaus, absolutely fucking _hates_ it. 

Klaus is a very private person and he really doesn’t like when people touch his stuff. That Duncan learned over the past two years they’ve been living together. 

Klaus would label his food like a lunatic, his younger sister, Sunny, lived just down the hall from their apartment so she would bring food over constantly (Klaus didn’t really cook himself) and Klaus would put a sticky note that would say “touch it and you’re dead” until Duncan learned not to touch unfamiliar containers and ingredients in the fridge. He even contemplated getting himself a whole other fridge instead. 

Yeah and the Quagmire was pretty sure that the last time he saw Klaus’ room was before he moved in. 

Even though in the first place it was Duncan’s apartment, Klaus was the one who set the rules. The Quagmire was just terrified of him, like very scared. Too scared for it to be normal. 

  
  


Okay what was I saying, the “cleaning” just meant Duncan snooping through the apartment and the Quagmire thought that was a very valid reason to touch Klaus’ stuff. 

Today was a day just like that, Klaus was at his job (he worked at a library, he was basically Duncan’s bookstore love story dream, except Duncan was sure Klaus was straight) and the Quagmire was _bored_. So he, naturally, started cleaning up. 

He didn’t dare to come into Klaus’ room, cause he was scared that if he opened the door he would face death, so he started off with the kitchen. Going through every cupboard and wiping down the counter until he got to the microwave. He found Klaus’ wallet sitting on top of the microwave. He must have forgotten it, he doesn’t drive to work so Duncan guessed he just didn’t need his license today. 

And the Quagmire knew that if he wouldn’t open the wallet and check through it he would _die_ from curiosity. 

Well so obviously he did. 

The wallet was made out of fake leather tinted a dark indigo. It felt nice to the touch and in order to open it you had to pull a zip, which was expected, Duncan wouldn’t be surprised if the wallet had a password on it. 

He carefully opened the object and looked inside, he instantly smiled as he was met with Klaus’ 16-year-old baby face on his driver’s license. 

“Klaus...Louis?” Duncan read out loud, since when did Klaus even _have_ a middle name? “Klaus Louis Baudelaire,” he read out loud, he shook his head, didn’t roll off of the tongue, maybe that’s why Klaus doesn’t talk about it. 

He continued to look through the wallet, a credit card, some cash, a picture of him with his sister and then- 

Duncan gasped, whatever he was expecting in the wallet, he was _not_ expecting to see his own face. 

The Quagmire didn’t even remember the day that picture was taken, he looked- sleepy. 

His hair was all ruffled up, and he was sitting in front of a plate of breakfast, it looked like it was barely sunrise outside, maybe that’s why Duncan forgot. He probably went to bed again after it, so he thought maybe it was a dream or- or maybe he just forgot. 

Duncan was grinning into the camera, eyes squinting, he held a fork with some scrambled eggs on it, a cup of tea in his other hand. 

The picture itself was carefully tugged away into a little compartment of the wallet. Duncan scratched his head, staring at the picture for another second before putting it away. 

The Quagmire continued cleaning, but every twenty minutes he would come back to the wallet and double check if the picture is still there, if he hadn’t hallucinated it. 

When Klaus came home Duncan was on edge, the Baudelaire just silently took his food out, warmed it in the microwave, when he noticed his wallet he obviously snatched it, and retreated to his room. 

Duncan had so many questions, for one _why_ did Klaus even have a picture of him in his wallet, why did he even take the picture? Was Klaus gay? Bi at least? Can Duncan come into Klaus’ room? What does his room even look like? What the fuck was going on?

The Quagmire paced in front of the door, stopping just to tap his foot on the floor. He was clutching a pair of rubber gloves, his arms crossed on his chest. 

Then he came in bursting into Klaus’ room. 

He breathed in and the questions came flying out, “Why do you have a picture of me in your wallet? How long have you had it there? When did you even take it? And why did you never tell me your middle name is Louis?” 

Klaus stared at him for a second, lifting up his eyebrow and the he reached..

He reached up to take out his earbuds, “What did you just say?” He asked, looking at the distressed Duncan, puzzled. 

“Uhm.. Err- i’m-“ Duncan stammered, he already lost his courage, “Why do you have a picture of me in your wallet...?” 

Klaus stares at him for a long second, “Did you touch my stuff again?” 

Duncan stares at him. He’s guilty. 

“Duncan, it's called _boundaries_ , we had a conversation about it. And I remember it since it happened _this week_ ,” Klaus says, standing up from his chair and walking up to Duncan, his arms now also crossed on his chest. 

“I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to! It was just _there_ and it was so tempting and- and-“

The Baudelaire lifted his arm in the air to stop his babbling, “Okay. Yes, I do have a picture of you in my wallet because i found it cute and i wanted to keep it somewhere safe. What now?” 

Duncan started at him, dumbfounded, “What now? You tell me! What does that even _mean_?”

“What does what even mean?” 

“You. Having. A picture. Of me. In. Your wallet. What does that mean. To you.” 

“..It means having a picture of you in my wallet- Duncan are you alright? Do you need to lay down?” 

Duncan finally tore away his gaze from Klaus’ face and he began to notice the room. It was very... Cozy. The Quagmire expected Klaus’ room to look like a vampire den, but instead of creepy decor Klaus just had family photos, posters and drawings taped on his walls. A whiteboard was standing right in the middle of the room, there were a lot of shelves with books on them, Klaus also had a paper airplane dangling off of his ceiling fan. It just looked like a pleasant place to be, and Duncan understood why the Baudelaire liked to spend his time there so much. 

It felt like home. 

He was snapped out of his thoughts by Klaus’ hand that was flying in front of his face, “Hey you alright?” He asked softly, placing a hand on Duncan’s upper arm. 

“I’m uh- I asked you a question,” Duncan said, determined to know the answer. 

Klaus sighed, covering his face with his hands “Well I.. Like you.” 

Duncan stood there for another minute, before asking “You do?” 

“Yeah,” Klaus said, letting his hands fall back to his sides, “I really do.”

And without another warning Duncan was surging forward and connecting their lips. 

The kiss was quick, Duncan’s lips were too wet and Klaus’ were too dry, but it was still tender. The Quagmire’s hands were gently holding Klaus’ face and when the boys parted they stayed there. 

“Well I uhm, I like you too,” Duncan giggled. He felt like a middle schooler who just confessed to his crush. 

“Well, then,“ Klaus said, placing his palms on top of Duncan’s and sliding them down to his shoulders, “I like you. You like me, I keep a picture of you in my wallet in a totally non-creepy-way,” Duncan chuckled, squeezing Klaus’ shoulders, “Would you go out on a date with me?” 

“Yes,” the Quagmire said and kissed Klaus’ nose, he couldn’t believe it was happening, “Yes,” he breathed again before reattaching their lips in a much sweeter kiss. 

Until they broke apart again, the Quagmire frowning, “I thought you were straight,” he says, looking Klaus in the eye. 

The Baudelaire just snorted in response, “Believe me, if i were to be straight, i wouldn’t want to make out with you right now.”

Duncan’s face turned red, “Well i’m not against _that_ for sure.” 

  
  
  
  
  



	2. The Same

“Klaus! Be careful!” Duncan exclaimed, as they stumbled into their apartment, it was around 5 AM and they just came back home from their going out. Well that’s if you put it lightly, which isn’t usually my style. 

My style is to say, “They got fucking hammered on a friday night at their favorite bar.”

And right now they were coming back home barely on their feet. 

As much as Klaus hates to admit it, Duncan handles alcohol much better than him, and even though the Quagmire is also having a hard time walking in a straight line, Klaus is having some hardcore struggles. 

When they finally got into their flat Klaus sparked a genius idea. 

“Hey Duncan,” he slurred, lifting up a finger.

“What?”

“Let’s make breakfast food.”

“Let’s.”

Duncan (who was more or less aware of his surroundings) stopped Klaus from putting his entire palm on the frying pan three times. 

After trying to cook scrambled eggs and bacon, and Klaus almost falling asleep when he was heating up the kettle for tea, it was already six am, the sun was coming up, and they were sitting eating breakfast, still very drunk. 

They were eating and laughing at every possible thing that both of them said until Klaus gasped and got up, rushing to his room. He came back with a little disposable camera. 

“Let’s photo you!” He exclaimed, slumping back into his chair, he quickly snapped three photos of Duncan sleepily grinning at the camera and then carried it back into his room. 

When they were done eating Klaus decided that it’s sleepy time for him and Duncan kindly helped him get dressed and into his bed.

“Hey Duncan,” Klaus mumbled, half asleep.

“What?” the Quagmire asked, sitting down on the bed next to him. 

“Did you know that my middle name is Louis?” 

Duncan snorted, “No, I didn’t, but now i do, thank you Klaus.”

“Goodnight Duncan.”

“Night.” 

After Klaus fell asleep Duncan admired his room for a bit, there was this one picture that he really liked, it was already light outside so he could clearly see it. 

Klaus was with Isadora in the picture, hugging her tightly by the waist. The woman was wearing a long wavy black dress with little flowers on them, and Klaus was wearing a business casual outfit. It was Violet and Quigley’s wedding, just two weeks before Isadora passed. 

Duncan remembered the picture taking as clear as day, mainly because he was the one who took it. 

Klaus and Isadora were both dancing their asses off and then they ran up to Duncan, Klaus pulling out his disposable camera, he shoved it into Duncan’s hands without a single word and then they just started posing, both high on the adrenaline (and god knows maybe something else) 

And two weeks later the accident happened. 

The Quagmires and the Baudelaires were long time friends, they knew each other since high school and Violet and Quigley were absolute soulmates. 

All of them loved each other and they cared for each other as if they were a family. 

Duncan used to share his apartment with Isadora, and after her passing Klaus moved in with him. 

Duncan couldn’t bear the emptiness in the apartment. He hated being alone. That's where the obsession with cleaning would come from. He always wanted something to be busy with until he exhausted himself to the point where he would just fall asleep. 

Isadora’s death changed their lives. Klaus wasn’t always that private. He wouldn’t keep so many secrets. But Duncan understood because he loved him. And because he knew that if he would have driven the car during the accident, like Klaus did, he wouldn’t have been able to live with himself anymore. 

All of them grieved differently, but time has passed and it’s a little easier now. Klaus doesn’t wake up in the middle of the night crying, coming into Duncan’s room and sleeping in his bed. Duncan doesn’t obsessively clean in the middle of the night anymore, trying to keep the apartment polished at all times. 

Violet doesn’t cry whenever she sees anything that could slightly remind her of Isadora. Quigley doesn’t visit her grave every day anymore and Sunny started cooking again, after not doing it for six months. 

They all got over it eventually, but it left an ugly scar. 

Duncan’s thoughts were interrupted by Klaus’ loud snoring, the Quagmire smiled, feeling the wetness on his cheeks. He didn’t even realize he was crying. 

He walked out of Klaus’ room, watched the dishes (he hated waking up to a mess in the morning) and went to sleep. 

In the morning he didn’t have any memory or evidence of the previous night actually happening, except for the dull pain in his head. 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yep i’m being sad. pay me in kudos and comments mwah thank you :)
> 
> The Same - Ashe

**Author's Note:**

> Real Love - Ashe


End file.
